It is not what happened to me, it is not even the betrayal by the people that I loved.
What upsets me the most is that because of what happens, I now trust few people and, given my divorces, few women.
What future is there for me? Alone with a bottle of wine and a packet of cigarettes? I do not want to be like this; I want to be alive as I was before, full of happiness and joy and looking forward to the future. Again I ask, what future is there for me now?
There is one person and one person only who can unlock the door to a better life for me. That person is so crucial in my current existence that without that person, I might as well hang myself. But with that person, I can start to live a new life, get off this bloody island and fulfill my dreams.
THAT IS WHAT I WANT; THAT IS ALL THAT I WANT