A message to Martin re our sick father

This post is rather self explanatory and has been sitting n my draft box for quite some while now but the public need to know what he is like
Dad

 

This message was sent with High importance.
David Hender
Fri 22/03/2019 12:22
Martin Hender;
Alison Hender;
Verity
Dear Martin,
In my emails and posts, I have not been angered but have tried to understand why things are the way that they are.
Most importantly, I have tried to understand your behaviour, your actions as well as your inaction. Maybe I am right, maybe this is actually all down to fear and that you cannot deal with it; that is a human emotion and should not be criticised.
But the issue has been that you have never conveyed your feelings to me, preferring to hide behind a veil of superficiality. My natural response has been to heavily damn you for what you have done as well as what you have not done.
You know Martin that this will not go away, no matter how much you try to ignore it and put your head in the sand. Sadly, it will get worse, much worse. You have not seen the end “result” with fine people not just being a shadow of their former selves but actually just living shells.
Do you not understand that I am well aware what my clever and successful father is to become? It is so horrible to think of it but sadly we are powerless to prevent it. Let us hope that when it comes to it, Dad is taken like Mum was, just before she lost who she was. Martin, Mum was still “with it” just before she went. I witnessed it whilst I was sitting with Mum, whilst you and Dad were with the doctor. Even though she had that mask on her face, forcing oxygen into her, she smiled at me and tapped my arm, as though to say that it would be alright. I will never forget that and just wish that you and Dad had been there.
But, our beloved Mum has gone and cruelly, Dad is suffering the same fate. Do you know how hard it is for me to be prevented from seeing my father and how cruel that is? You cannot imagine.
When Dad told me of his illness, he knew damn well where the desire to have him in a suitable place would come from; me. So, he bribed you with more money that you could ever spend, he bribed Sam and the ultimate action; he set up me for a fall when I was falsely accused of abusing Verity and when that failed, he tried to bribe me to leave the country. He wanted me out of the way so that I could not push and push as I have done.
Literally everything boils down to Dad wanted to be shielded from me. The false allegations, the bribery of Sam, the failed bribery of me, Verity keeping away from me and, of course, your life being paved with gold. Dad knew exactly which of your buttons could be pressed to gain your loyalty, as well as you being a mason, as is John Marriott and probably Ron as well, as you are sworn to do anything for your “brothers”.
You cannot imagine what my life has been like although, at times, your brotherly concern has got the best of you and you have called the Police to check on me, if not done in a half-hearted way.
Without my family and, especially, without Verity, I have nothing; I am nothing, as I have lost ALL of those who were dear to me.
Apart from my blog, my only outlet is Nick and after Nick, I did some chores that included picking up my meds. With it was two letters, one to do with my “normal” health, inviting me to go for tests and one for my epilepsy. I will not be going to either test or review? Why? Because Martin, there is no point. I am safe to drive as that is all that matters to me, as it was me who voluntarily surrendered my license after my big Porsche crash.
If I have a disease or cancer, which is highly likely now, I do not care as all that I will want is pain relief to numb the pain and I will die and be with Mum and Liesel again. I have not exactly given up but there is nothing, absolutely nothing to look forward to and so what is the point. I have fought and fought, just like Liesel and Ali did when they were ill but there comes a time when you realise that there is no point going on and I have reached that point.
I have tried so hard to reconcile, not just with the family but with everyone but this wall of silence went up to shield OUR Dad from me.
There is still time.
I sent you a quote to say that it is not the past that defines you but what you do in the future and that applies to Verity too.
If any of this has “hit a chord”, then we should talk, face to face. I am prepared to come over to the mainland and meet you in a neutral place, just the two of us. This offer is not made lightly as it takes nearly two hours to travel just two miles across the Solent and then there is the drive to you.
When I tried to call in Social services to assess Dad, I promptly received a call from a policeman, who threatened me with arrest and imprisonment if I called them. The experience of what happened when I was arrested over Verity prevented me from doing what I should have done but I WAS SCARED and did nothing.
So, we are both to blame for the lack of provisions for our Dad but it does not matter who is at fault; it is all about Dad and nothing but Dad and this can be put right; EVERYTHING ELSE can be sorted out later.
You have my number and you have my email address. Think very hard about what is ACTUALLY happening to our Dad. I know that it is hard bro but we have to accept the inevitable; YOU have to accept the inevitable as no amount of money or distractions will change that.
It will not change anything
David

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